There is nothing in the World that is more calming yet scary than water. Water gives me a Sense of Safety and yet also signifies challenge. My memory of the first time I laid eyes on a Body of water was when I lived in the Country on the Potomac River in Virginia. There was nothing as peaceful and serene as the stillness of it and the sunrises and sunsets on it. My father had hung a swing on a tree branch and right above a slight incline that took us down to the dock and small beach on the water that was in front of our house. If you swung too high and tried to jump, you would surely roll down it. Luckily, neither myself nor anyone else who swung on it had the misfortune of falling off. The Country River house was the definition of every bit of Safety to me. For the most part, I had good friends and went to a good School and had good teachers. 

Nothing can prepare a young ten year old to ever have to leave her Safety. My father had symptoms of a heart attack from having “Heart disease” which would lead to his first Bypass surgery and we were forced to move to the City. Things happened so quickly. Occasionally however, we did get to go back down to the River for a little getaway or to gain back some Serenity and Peace. So, when we first moved to the City; my mother, sister and father were all living together in a two-bedroom in one of my father’s apartment Buildings. One of my brothers was in College and the other was in his last year of High School, I believe, so they did not have to endure living there as long as my sister and I had. Luckily, about a year or two later (as my memory can remember), my father finally bought us a house in the City at a really good rate. 

Our second home was fantastic. My mother put on many parties and events there. Her side of the family and friends of families of the Daycare my mother helped run for about nine years near our home would come over. There was not ever a dull moment in this house that I lived in. My mother kept that house running for a little over twenty years. It blows my mind to think about all that we lived through there. It is almost like a blur to me. I drive by it once or twice a year, and always see an image of my father walking away from me when I was twenty-three and had just started dating military men. I have to laugh, as I believe he was angry and jealous of the news that his first born daughter was choosing a different path in Life. I do not miss that home and honestly do not miss the Country home either. When people say, we start New Chapters, we REALLY do, and don’t ever look back! 

Heaven has a different definition for each of us. My heaven was anywhere I may not have had to deal with not being seen or even heard. Heaven was getting away from gossip, conflict, judgment, false blame and guilt, and told I was not doing things good enough. Heaven was staying in my room in our second house listening to music, fantasizing about movie celebrities and writing in my Journal. Music was my Saving Grace. Music was my Lifeline. Music spoke volumes to me and it brought me so much Love, Joy, and comfort I needed during my Parents divorce. Heaven comes in many forms. 

When I was younger living in our second family home in the City, I often imagined and dreamed of being able to “Get Away” or to travel more with someone; whether it be a male companion or friends. I had not ever imagined in my wildest dreams that I would actually get to have travelled all due to and thanks to meeting people in the Military. My first and only husband and I wound up doing ‘just that’. He gave me the opportunity to travel. Not that I had not already had the experience of travelling to Europe in 1997. I did not or had not met my now ex-husband until the following year after I had travelled to Italy to meet another Love interest I had at the time. 

Beyond my wildest dreams Only like it happens in fairy tales, namely like in the book “Cinderella”, would I have ever imagined my first and Only marriage partner, ever buying me/us, a home. It was my third Heaven. Heaven defining a ‘home’, a Safe place to live. Some place I could remember forever. Call me a dreamer. Call me spoiled. Call me Selfish, yet We are all allowed to have our own dreams, whether it be a home or a dream of accomplishing something we’re proud at  something we’re working towards. I am extremely lucky and fortunate to have had GREAT places to live. My heaven! 

There are many, many other places I can say that were Heaven to me. Places I’ve travelled to. There is nothing that can make you forget the images and scenery you remember for a Lifetime. Pictures to me don’t ever justify what you remember in your minds-eye, NOT EVER!!!