Letting Go of Judgments

Showing Up for Myself and Others

Showing Up for Myself and Others

So the other day I had listened to a good educational Class on Branding and how we can represent and show up for ourselves and for others and it got me thinking. I was hoping and praying to be able to think more clearly and gain some Clarity and Creativity as I was...

Loving Myself and Gaining My Power

Loving Myself and Gaining My Power

There are so many things and people that have distracted me from my Dreams, Goals and from what I REALLY wanted to contribute to others. I believe that we all have it within us to contribute, add value and Love into people's lives. Giving and Loving adds an...

Please Meditate and Do Yoga!

Please Meditate and Do Yoga!

If you feel depression and Anxiety and you want a Life change. Please find a therapist. Please get on medication if you can find one for you? Please get up and exercise and move your Body. Please Journal your thoughts and feelings. Please Journal just about anything...

Traveling is a Must!

Traveling is a Must!

I love the Ocean. I love water would be a better statement. I however do not like swimming in the Ocean, at least not deep. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined taking a Boat or Catamaran or any other floating vessel out into the Ocean, yet I have had...

Living in Heaven

Living in Heaven

There is nothing in the World that is more calming yet scary than water. Water gives me a Sense of Safety and yet also signifies challenge. My memory of the first time I laid eyes on a Body of water was when I lived in the Country on the Potomac River in Virginia....

Always TRY again!

Always TRY again!

I had mentioned in the Chapter about '‘Big Dreams…” that I often wanted to do what others may have been doing Career wise; although, I still somewhat stuck to my own Goals & Dreams of staying with being an Entrepreneur or Small Business owner. I disliked myself...

2021, Yasss!

Last year was Phenomenal for me. I know that is probably hard to believe given that America and the World had to be on pause for the Corona Virus Pandemic. It was a strange year, yet the most successful year for me since 2014 & 2016. I was able to create a Small business that may not be very lucrative since I have a lot of Competitors where I live. That’s OK, I am remaining hopeful. I have a small niche to help other people organize their homes and offices, cars, etcetera. I have a true passion for people to be able to breathe and live simply without a lot of stuff. I was told by someone close to me that people fill their lives up with possessions when they are not happy or if they are depressed. This is a true fact!!! I am so Extremely proud of myself. Ha, me proud? Yes, I even called a Lawyer to see how much it would cost to type up a Legal contract for my clients and this guy was going to charge me $600. Now, it doesn’t sound bad, especially if it protects me from a Client lawsuit. Yikes! Yet, I am not spending that much when I can write up my own and I have written my own up with the help of Resources I have discovered online and even my Graphic designer. Don’t tell her I said so, thank you Kimberly! Anyhow, this new Year, I am continuuing to take care of my health, exercise, eat right, Keep up with blogging, and finding the right Job that doesn’t get my attention deficit all in a bundle. I am not afraid to admit I am a slow worker. Once I get the hang of things, I can work faster and hopefully not sloppily. I am excited for this year. I hope to make new friendships, a good Client base. I hope that I can collaborate and even find people who can give me good Business advice without deterring me. Kindness pays people. We should all be supporting people to do well in their Small Business ventures and whatever other talents we have.

Core Values I hold on to

This is just something extra I thought I would add that means a lot to me. All of these values hold some meaning and significance to me. All of these take practice in my eyes and not all of them can be perfected, yet we can do and try our best. Also, we have to believe that we are some of these already or already hold some of these dear to us already. Maybe we learned them from our parents, siblings, or even other friends and mentors. I believe in holding true to my Values in order to have a Life worth Loving!!! 

Assertive  (needs work)                                                 Patience

Awareness                                                                        Peace

Beauty                                                                                Power

Courage/Bravery                                                             Productivity

Certainty                                                                            Prosperity

Clarity                                                                                Purpose

Common Sense                                                                Results-Oriented

Communication                                                              Service

Collaborationg (ideas)                                                   Sharing

Competence/Abilities                                                   Security

Confidence                                                                       Significance

Connection                                                                       Spirituality

Curiosity                                                                           Strength/Vitality

Determination                                                                 Success

Empathy/Feelings                                                          Thankful/Gratitude

Empower/Inspire                                                           Transparent/Vulnerable/Authentic

Energy                                                                              Truth                           

Enjoyment/Pleasure/Adventure/Explore                Understanding

Excellence                                                                        Uniqueness/Openness

Focus                                                                                 Unity

Growth/Learning                                                             Vision/Perspective

Harmony                                                                            Wisdom

Health

Hope

Inquistive

Intelligence

Leadership

Love

Loyalty

Motivation

Optimism

Organization

Limited Beliefs Hold You Back

Limited Beliefs Hold You Back

I actually can’t believe I am about to say this, but it seems most of my Life I have felt too afraid to accomplish the small goals towards my Bigger goals and Dreams that I wanted. For instance, being a Small Business Entrepreneur, it seems nowdays that more and more Business are also Online Marketing and advertising. All of that can be used to explain at a later time, I suppose. The bottom line for me is that I have held myself back, given up, taken much longer than needed breaks, allowed others to persuade me not to go down a certain path on my way to the bigger path. Mostly I believe, I have held my own self back, yet it was easy for me to blame others. I needed a more supportive Group of people surrounding me. I needed people who maybe had the same goals or direction as I did or that knew how to get me to the final destination. Perhaps even a researcher or personal assistants, and even other people who could and would be assigned to certain tasks to help me get to a certain goal faster. I have seen this with other Authors I have followed. I needed a ‘Supporting Cast’ to be guided to the desired outcome.

When I see other people succeed, I often wonder how big a team they have working with them or standing behind them? There are so many successful people who have Businesses and who are branding and marketing themselves online. This is how I imagine other places of Business, celebrities, writers, Managers and leaders are. They all have to have a team of people, no matter how big or small.

Within the last month or so, during the Covid-19 Pandemic, I had a conversation with my sister explaining briefly my desire to have a ‘Supporting Cast’. She didn’t ask me what it is that I thought someone would do to help me out? No one in my extended or immediate family has ever asked me. The worst part is when someone has Limited Beliefs about what someone can do. It seems I will have to work on it alone, “independently”, assigning myself small goals and tasks to get me to the next step on my own!

 

Most of the people in my family have doubts about themselves, didn’t believe they could do something, or we just simply thought about something more than we took an action to accomplish it. It takes tons of Researching, learning, writing, and pure God-given talent and ability to retain information to be useful in the Real World, to be able to contribute to the World and others. It is completely sad when we judge ourselves and our abilities. When we don’t believe we are good enough. I am shaking my head a little. I believe that having Limiting Beliefs is a conditioned and learned experienced passed down from our parents and from other people who are negative minded, or just don’t have a belief that ANYTHING is possible or can be done if we believe in it strongly enough. People can be told repetitively that something may not work and then we REALLY, TRULY believe it; therefore never even giving it a chance or try.

I believe that when we have Limiting Beliefs, the next step is to really seek Validation and Positive affirmations from an Outside source. I have been advised not to seek Outside Validation. I believe it’s healthy to be given positive affirmations. It helps feed our subconscious into doing Greater things. I will tell you what!, the last 5 months have been phenomenal for me because I have found so much outside validation to get me motivated, pumped up, enthused, maybe a little more confident about approaching my goals. I have learned what to say to myself, how to talk positively about myself, how to deal with my emotions, how to build Resiliency, how not to listen to others’ negative opinions about whether I could or could not accomplish something. It has taken me a long ass time to Validate myself, as I could not ever get it from people who could not ever give it to me.

Perhaps include a Story about how other people had Limited Beliefs and where they got them from???

 

 

Standing By Your Values

Standing By Your Values

Perhaps the most important and best thing we can ever do for ourselves is not to allow others to persuade us out of what we truly Believe. The things we know won’t harm us. The things that would never cause us to lose our health and to truly be able to give to others, not just one person. It is EXTREMELY important to look out for ourselves. I hold on to values of really not trying to hurt someone else. I have however also gotten vengeance on someone that hurt me and it didn’t really do much in the long run. By that, I mean, it didn’t change that person from ever wronging me again. Sure, it hurt the person I got back, yet it didn’t change anything in our relationship in the long run. I know that sounded repetitive. 

Some of my values and beliefs have changed incredibly in the last three to four years. I definitely see things from a totally different perspective than all of the members of my Immediate family and perhaps even differently than my extended family. I told myself that I would be completely vulnerable and share some of the beliefs that I have. I have definitely changed my Spiritual perspective and that is only because the Christians in my Life have tunnel-vision. They don’t have the same heart as me when it comes to possibly opening their doors up to someone who could be homeless, especially not their own bloodline. I have been homeless and felt like I had no control of my own Life and decisions and nowhere else to go and no one else to turn to for Safety. Do not get me wrong though, and I am completely sounding like a double-standard here, but there are certain people I would not open my door to as well. Two of my most memorable experiences of people in my Life that were not Christian who did anything for me were my Catholic friends. My old friend and acquaintance Katey and her parents opened their doors to me when I was struggling and also my Pretend adopted mother Geneva. I will never forget either of these Groups of people for as long as I live. I would elaborate on the Story, yet it just goes to show that good things and miracles come when you least expect and from people you least expect. 

The last four men I had had a relationship and friendship with were completely toxic to me and really had nothing to offer me. I made believe in my mind that they had something to give as I had seen them give to other people in both big and small ways. I wanted to be given the same way. I wanted to feel Safe and protected by them. I compromised everything and all my Values for them, for a false fantasy. Needless to say, lessons are definitely learned. I am probably Only going to say this once, if you are a Parent, PLEASE NEVER hesitate to tell your children to “Love themselves”, explain what it means, to not Sacrifice your own health and mind over someone else, especially if they hurt you once or even maybe a dozen times. There needs to be a line you draw, a Boundary. 

There is so much fun relative to the Values you hold true to. A new value I am going to hold on to much like the word Loyalty is being Competent. My therapist at the moment just shared this word with me and I’m going to tell you that I have seen this word so many times in my Job Search. Companies and people want someone who is competent and able and who is fully going to Show up. Ironically, I already knew this, it’s just I have to constantly tell myself EVERY SINGLE Day just as I will show up for myself in my own Business!!!